Why stepping out of your role as Superwoman will break the stress cycle.
According to James Clear, the following things keep talented people from fulfilling their potential:
- Trying to please everyone
- Imitating the desires of others
- Chasing status without questioning why
- Playing superhero and trying to do it all alone
- Dividing your attention between too many projects
“Playing superhero and trying to do it all alone.”
The term, superwoman, was coined by the author, Marjorie Hansen Shaevitz who wrote the 1984 book, The Superwoman Syndrome. The basis of the book was “for women trying to do it all – how to decide what’s important in your life and do it well.”
Whether you are trying to be the perfect colleague, mother, partner, sibling, or housekeeper, it is time to step out of this unrealistic role and the stress it produces.
Sure, you could do it all. You could please everyone, and say “yes” to everything. Maybe you can’t say “no” to others or yourself because of feelings of guilt or inadequacy.
But have you ever stopped to consider how this role serves you?
Perhaps “doing it all” makes you feel accomplished and gives you the attention you need and desire from loved ones. Maybe you measure your self-worth entirely in terms of productivity and tangible accomplishments.
Hey, I get it. No one wants to be average. We all want 10/10 scores in multiple or conflicting roles (or even in one role). We push ourselves to excel with unnaturally high standards and impossible goals in health, finances, relationships, and personal development.
More often than not, we cannot excel in every area. Not without some trade-offs at least. Consequently, life is more stressful. Day-to-day activities coupled with unrelenting demands and unrealistic expectations lead to feelings of low mood, burnout, anxiety, depression, and loss of self-worth.
When our self-worth diminishes, the “Superwoman Syndrome” presents itself in physical, psychological, or interpersonal symptoms.
When we are constantly striving to accomplish everything possible in a perfect manner, we are not balancing the stressful demands of life with adequate rest, recovery, and a heavy dose of self-compassion. Stress wreaks havoc on our health when it is not buffered by self-care.
But, if I had to guess, you probably do not have the time or energy to devote to self-care. Even if you had the time, you may consider it selfish to indulge in self-care or to simply provide yourself with quiet time alone.
Listen, you are not alone. This is a shared human experience. However, it is time to be proactive and reframe your sense of identity and self-worth – without the compulsive need to be perfect.
This message is for all of the talented, creative, and passionate people who are choosing to step out of the role of Superhero and into their own personal role as a self-compassionate human being.
You are good enough already.
Self-care and self-compassion are what truly defines you as a Super Hero!